I'm downloading mIRC right now so I can get a bunch of movies to watch.
The house was blessed with Nintendo, Super Nintedo, and a Sega and all at low low prices tonight. The whole setup and a few games for around $60! SCORE!
Cera's working with me at the telemarketing place now. She went in for an interview this afternoon and the manager told her to start tonight so she did. It's going to be awesome to not have to suffer through work without her.

I'm sitting here today definately dreading going to work. It snowed like an inch last night and it's still snowing. Man it sucks to have to ride a bike to work. I ran into a friend from High school at work last night and it was a total trip. After work she came over and hung out with the kids and I think she had a good time.
I'm glad I'm working again. It kindof feels good to know that I'm being productive and that things are going somewhere for me. I've decided to take my tax refund and go to California to see my bro Al. I'm sure that it will be a great time. How could I go to San Diego and not have a kick-ass time?

Man, I havn't updated lately. This weekend Cera and I borrowed Ashley's car and went to Madison. It was fun. I miss my dad a lot. It was great to get to see him. Crazy stuff with Josh that made me shitty wierd for like two days, that's why I have not updated.
Lindsay is here!
Later...

TOnight I watched "Vanilla Sky" and I didn't hate it like I thought I would, actually it was pretty interesting. It felt much like a kubric film but not quite as cool. Good Musical selections such as the Spiritualized track which I like a lot and a couple really good Radiodhead songs. The plot felt shakier than it should have. There should have been more hintings at what exactly was going on. It was just a little hard to follow. Fast paced and didn't feel as long as it really was. Over all an excellent flick.

The only thing that remains of last night are lingerings of the hazy twisted experience that it was. I always try to get people to describe to me what their experiences are like and sometimes I get really good descriptions but I have yet to find anyone who could even begin to describe the effects of shrooms. Maybe it's because it's different for everyone or becuase it's just so fucked up that it's very hard to communicate what's going on as you can see from my post last night. So I have two experiences from last night that I'm going to try to explain.
While I was at the show I sat in back and watched the band and the people walking around and talking. Looking at the whole scene felt relatively normal exept when I would look at say two people in a conversation it looked like a second of time would stop rewind and then play again. I could see normal things happening like someone walking across the room and people talking to me which made me really nervous because I was worried that I looked just as fucked up as everything appeared to me. The music sounded so fucked up and disorted it's ridiculous. If you play electric guitar you'll understand this next comment; I told Cera last night that it felt like the world was on delay.
Heavy tracers that at times were so long and fat that i could barely see what was going on in real time. Josh told me not to look at mirrors and now I know why. At some point I went to the bathroom to blow my nose and I just happened to look up at a mirror. It wasn't scary like I expected it to be it was just really twisted and distorted.
That's what happened to me last night.

can't describe what's going on right now shrooms I ate earlier wonder what's going on.
We saw the 100's earlier. They were really good. Sometimes thingsa feel backwards. Music feels good. everything in rythymmm MMM goood. Yeah Yeah

I'm off for an exciting fun filled evening B-town style. I think we're going to a house party for awhile then maybe a bar off Kirkwood called Uncle Festors. Should be super-fun whatever we do.

J-Rock rules by the way

I GOT THE JOB! Finally I'm going to be part of the workforce again. I'm going to work my tail off making better money than I could anywhere else with my experience. This job is going to be a resume builder. I'm starting my life now. Things are getting better. I need to start looking at schools soon.
Happy V-Day everyone!

I'm going to an interview in an hour. I'm seeing about a telemarketing job. It pays better than any other place I'm qualified to work for so why not.
I'm in a constant state of sleepiness. It sucks.

I was told sternly that I should update my page. Dave this one is dedicated to you.
Micah wrote me a lengthy e-mail telling me to shape up and take action. I'm working on it. I have an interview for a telemarketing job on wed. Hopefully I can get this job and write Micah and tell him that 'Yes' I'm going to commit to Chicago and go up there to be productive for a year. I Love him and he's been really fucking cool to me. He's always honest and he's really interesting. I want him to be with us in Chicago and I want to follow through with this one.
Micah, come to Chi-town with us.

I'm in Layfeyette, IN right now. We're hanging out with Cera's family. They're really funny. Aparently tonight we're going to see a jam band called "Lefty." It'll be fun if we can get into the bar. Eli's a little monster. Lata'

It is just a ridiculously beautiful day today. I'm going to go outside, take my shoes off, and read a bit. I just started "Atlas Shrugged." Maybe I'll write some too. I got an e-mail from Micah today saying that he thinks moving to Chicago is a great idea. Yay! Maybe he'll come with us.

Canadite for band name:
Blunts For Breakfast!

My soul is a cup that has been overflowed with failure. Every thing that I've fucked up or failed at has added to my soul cup. Today my cup spilled and I was thrown into a deep watery darkness. It seemed to envelope me in a deep-sea pressure sort of way. I am a rock that has found it's way quickly to the murky muddy deapths.
I am in Bloomington hoping to get a job at a pizza place. The sad part is that I really want a pizza job. I'll be excited to get a pizza job. I will love getting a job. I want to thank my brother Al for writing and for being supportive of me. Thanks!

Everything in the world has a rythym and time. I feel out of tempo with the rest of the world. In "Requiem For a Dream" (which I watched last night for the second time) every scene is wrapped around some sort of melody or rythym. It's amazing how music can fit with a scene. Is it fast or slow or deppresing? What is the musical feel of your life? Nine Inch Nails has a dark and fast sound and it seems to fit my life the best right now. We've decided to find a house in Chicago. I'd like to live in the neighborhood near Wrigley Field. Maybe Chicago in spring is a great idea. Maybe someone in Chicago will want me.

For your Consideration
Most people at some point in their lives consider what their ‘place in the world’ is. I wonder if I have a ‘place.’ Am I just destined to travel and work and lead a miserable unfulfilling life? I’ve been suggested prayer, drugs, sex, masturbation, meditation, elevation, destination, and everything in between. The world is a huge place for me right now and I’m so very lost. God. Is God the electricity that runs through every human mind or a mythical Lightning Thrower in the sky? Man has been beyond the sky and through what lies beyond that. In these times of greed and anger where do I find the security and humility to continue? Is the purpose of life merely to survive it and last one more day? Is there a ‘plan?’ I wish it would be bestowed upon me. It would save me a lot of pain to know what I’m supposed to do. I feel like I have a gift of creativity. Too bad that four million other people also have a gift of creativity, and that their gifts were bigger and better than mine.
A train rolls past every few hours, too fast to grab a hold of. It teases me with the idea of travel. It thunders past with the same force that makes these letters possible. I wake up to a new day not knowing what it will bring. Will I be in this town by the end of this day? Will I be arrested for drugs? Will I find a job? Work; such an unsightful word. It means toil and sweat and dirt. Why can’t I make money doing what I like to do? What do I like to do? I like spending time with Cera. I like music, meeting new people, talking, creating, thinking, problem solving, writing, designing, drawing, photography, art, playing music, skateboarding, snowboarding and other sports. I have so many ideas but why would anyone want to listen to them. I am a slowly rotting corpse. I am discarded before I even start. I am alone with my thoughts.
It is said that I must prove myself before people will recognize me. I have a lot to learn yet I can’t get an education. And what kind of education would it be anyway. Government run schools telling me what I should think and read and how to create. I can not use other people’s ideas. I wrap hair ties around my fingers to remind me of my fingers. Why am I so strange? Will someone appreciate my strangeness and see something in me that I fail to see myself. Will I meet someone who needs a person like me? No one wants a pot-smoking, drinking, young, idealistic fool. The need for me is limited if at all. I’m tired.
I’m tired of having no idea what I should make of myself. I have absolutely no desire to mold myself into what someone else considers a good employee. Who I am is the best thing going for me. The fact that I am like no other person on earth in thought or in design must make me desirable to someone right?

I'm going to bloomington today to see about a job. I think Papa John's. Ashley and Meagan both work there and they don't hate it sooo. I guess I'll give it a shot. I packed my stuff and I am very ready to go. I'm ready to be in Bloomington. I've wanted to live there for a long time. Hopefully I can contact Josh and see if he needs another housemate. Eee I'm excited.

Is it time yet?

Dirk Diggler: Aren't you gonna take your skates off?
Rollergirl: I never take my skates off.

They should have burned the fucking place to the ground.
How do you feel about the World Trade Organization? Sign my guestbook with your response.

I had a great time this weekend. Last night we went to "Uncle Festors" in Bloomington and watched this great blues band- Mike Milligan and Steam Shovel They played Stevie Ray, Muddy Waters, and some originals. Mike was throwing down some mean licks on his dirty sounding Fender while Derek rolled out nice beats with style. Shaun plucked some funky bass when it needed it and layed solid rhythms others. As a group the band got the whole crowd moving and thrilled blues-lovers like myself.

Leaving Cera's presence is such a downer. I missed my Dad's visit this morning. I have no idea what I want to do with my life. And according to Amanda "Sean, you hate everything."
I'm in a kill! Kill! KILL! kind of mood.

I was thinking about sk8ting today since I pretty much can't skate in Franklin anymore and I thought about Louisville. Louisville has had a 30 million dollar skatpark in the planning for a while. Now they've broken ground and put up conceptual design on the site. RULE!
It makes me want to cream my jeans.Oh wait I don't wear jeans.

Drunken silliness and Naked sleeping. I've found myself in B-town once again. It's amazing how I just happen to find myself places. It's hard to tell where I might end up next. It's such freedom. I Love it. I'm having all sorts of fun with Cera.
Richard Simmons is Scary.

I have to be the only person in the world updating their blog right now. 9PM on a friday night. I'm waiting for Cera to surprise me. There was word of a party tonight in Indy and she said that they would pick me up on the way. Another fun filled evening with Cera is in store I'm sure. I have more fun with her than I do with everyone else I know combined.
"Doesn't it make you feel better"
NIN

I have an interview at a well known Taco place tonight. I'm not putting on pants until then damnit. No pants!! DO you hear me? No Pants! It's an underwear party in my head! Woo-Hoo. I have to pep myself up for tonights interview. If anyone has ever seen Cera's fake smile, that's how I feel right now.
I'm listening to the Cure's Disintegration albumn and I've decided that it's going to somehow disapear from Amanda's collection. Mwaa Haa Haa.
I'm so weird.